Connected By Loss: Some Thoughts on Leadership

What Qualities Define a Leader?


Today, for the first time ever, Naina went to nursery school in uniform. She looked adorable in her bright blue pinafore over a  white and blue pinstripe shirt, socks and black school shoes. Last night Sangeeta was talking about how excited Akshay would have been, and how we would all have been treated to Nainu’s smiling pictures on the family whatsapp. When I see Naina in the morning,  am instantly transported to Akshay-Neha’s first day at school. The image was so bright, it seemed as if they were Naina’s age just a few years ago! I tell Naina, ‘you know Nainu, when your papa was small like you, he couldn’t say uniform…he would call it ‘niniform’. She smiles cutely, her eyes lighting up with amusement.  Almost immediately, she repeats the sentence to Sangy and Birendar bhaiya(our gardener),  exactly as I had spoken, but replaces the words ‘your papa’ with ‘Akshay’. We all smile and chat about her clear understanding of relationships. Life goes on, as it must.

Two weeks ago, Student volunteers from PES-IT (a well-known engineering college in Bengaluru) invited us, as a ‘martyr family’, to a 3 day event in honour of Akshay and nine other martyrs. Organized by students and encouraged by the institution, ‘Samarpana’ has been an annual event to felicitate families of soldiers who have made the supreme sacrifice for their country. As I sat with a young volunteer who was being very sweet in keeping me company, we exchanged the usual pleasantries. In response to her ‘we are honoured to have you here’, I asked her about her course, hostel facilities, food and so on. As I was admiring the bright ventilated building space that was also green and well maintained, she asked a very simple question. ‘What do your children do ….how many children do you have…? Caught off guard, I tried answering…. and failed miserably.

Although I felt terrible for the young girl who kept saying ‘I am so sorry….you were in a good mood when you came and I did this to you….’, I could not rein in my tears for many minutes. Then, with great effort, I managed to regain composure and reassure her that it wasn’t her fault in any way. That this has been happening to me very often, actually almost every day….

Once home after the honour ceremony, I did look for answers on ‘how to cope with sudden breakdown’ and the internet gave me an explanation that said: “It’s so curious: one can resist tears and ‘behave’ very well in the hardest hours of grief. But then someone makes you a friendly sign behind a window, or one notices that a flower that was in bud only yesterday has suddenly blossomed, or a letter slips from a drawer… and everything collapses.” — Colette, the French writer, identified “triggers” as skillfully as a modern-day psychologist and she is right. Human emotion is strongly linked to memory. And memory cannot be schooled or programmed selectively to trigger only joy.

In the recent news headlines on TV and print, we have been bombarded with ‘breaking news’ on ‘elections’ and ‘the security situation in Kashmir’.  In the social media, I happen to see a disturbing video. A young officer obviously hit by bullets has fallen to the ground. Flat on his back, surrounded by forest foliage, even as he is probably dying, conscious of his duty and responsibility, he is talking to the men under his command. What strikes hardest is his composure despite being grievously injured; issuing clear orders on what the other soldiers should do next. The conversation in Hindi goes like this:

Injured Officer: make sure every injured soldier gets first aid. Then get yourselves out safely. Get every man out. Tell the headquarters they have to immediately send help. There is no shortage of ammunition- keep firing single shots to keep the enemy engaged. Do not move ahead and make sure there is no panic or cross firing. Tell Delta one…’ at this stage he pauses and his voice becomes feeble as he continues, ‘that the command is now in his hands’. The voices of a few concerned soldiers are heard comforting the officer with, ‘yes Sir. Please don’t speak any more now. Don’t worry. We will make sure we take our injured out with us’.

Yet the injured young officer, probably realizing time is short continues talking to his men; ‘And if you hear a helicopter, light a small fire so they see the smoke and land. Then shift the injured.

The video ends with the voice of a soldier once again pleading with the officer, ‘…Sir don’t speak anymore…don’t worry at all…’ and then someone else is heard saying ‘…it is getting very late …..’.  My heart stopped at the possibility of what may have happened next. Did it become too late? Or did the injured officer and soldiers make it out alive?

I try to push away the painful stab in the stomach but it returns faithfully every day. The same words continue to ring in the ears. ‘I am sorry to tell you maam, that we have lost Major Akshay.’

Who are these young men who in the face of death, consciously place the safety of others uppermost? Why do they make sure they do their duty and fulfill their responsibilities at any cost? While bleeding and in obvious trauma, how do they stay calm….and positive….thinking only about getting their colleagues out safely? Not a mention of their own pain….not a word about missing their families…no trace of selfishness….. fear kept under tight control…..these young people don’t even belong to  that state and yet, they are out there, defending us as best as they can.

Why are our family members hurt and killed in Kashmir? Is the army responsible for the mess that the state of J&K is in? The army has been called in by the government because their so called leaders have failed to do what they have been elected for. For decades, they have failed us all. While they have lived with power, prestige and luxury, they have taken no responsibility for the seething discontent in the valley. They have ‘governed’ so poorly and passed the buck to such an extent, that the situation has now come to this. Do these political masters have anyone from their family in the army? Or even a son or daughter among those pelting stones at the security forces? No wonder lives lost mean little to them. They and their families are always safe, thanks to the security provided to them. What they have ‘succeeded’ in doing very effectively is to shift the blame for their failures on to our soldiers who die defending them. Loud voices siding with separatists and terrorists also find favour with most of our TV news channels as they, day in and day out, debate  ‘democracy’ and ‘human rights’.

On the other hand, one among the brave young soldier-leaders who took pride in serving our nation and our people, was our adorable son Akshay. Sangeeta’s beloved husband, Neha’s ‘best ever’ brother, Naina’s ‘hero’ father, the apple of his grandparents ageing eyes, the ‘bro’ admired by his cousins and Pradish, Beena and Ravindrans ‘second son’, and everyone’s ever-smiling, happy-to-help, always-there-for-you friend. He is no longer around for any of us because he believed protecting co-citizens was his responsibility. No cost was too high. He made us very proud. We hope he somehow knows we have taken strength from him and will do the best we can whenever called upon to do so.

I look up at Akshay’s pictures on our walls and my eyes play their tricks, bringing him back to life. There he is smiling at me…eyes twinkling….no trace of the anguish we are all going through without him. Soldiers are painted as strong and powerful and yet, what I recollect is how gentle and caring Akshay would be with all of us. How he never let me and Girish carry a heavy bag; how he would slow down his scooter when Neha said speed scared her; how his eyes followed Sangeeta, waiting to see her smile; how he held little Naina, like she was a delicate flower……. Akshay’s gentleness extended even to those he did not personally know. Once, when a drunk stranger tried to break into our home late at night, all Akshay did was firmly push the young man out, believing he had lost his way and meant no harm.  When a bus banged into his new car, not only was he polite to the bus-driver, he agreed not to register a police case because the driver would lose his new job. Criticizing, hitting, accusing…. or throwing stones and running away, was never part of Akshay’s way of life.

The TV is on even as I write this piece. The image of a young man tied to an army jeep in the Kashmir valley  is being aired again and again. We are told a young officer did so to ensure safe passage of security personnel and election duty staff who were surrounded by a dangerous mob of hundreds of stone pelters. While political leaders can get away with acts like hitting an airline employee 25 times with a ‘chappal’, fight dirty to usurp a dead CM’s ‘legacy’, steal, cheat and even commit rape and murder without being held accountable, this young officers’ timely action to save lives is ‘unacceptable’! Doesn’t ‘The End Justifies the Means’ philosophy hold good in this case? What did the young commander do to be berated in this manner?  With little time to spare and limited resources on hand, he did his duty. He did not shun his responsibility when called upon to protect a group of pro-government citizens from hundreds of stone pelters positioned to maim and kill.

Didn’t we see earlier videos of such stone pelters shielding terrorists and preventing the evacuation of injured soldiers? Didn’t we read about how terrorists got away and an officer and two jawans died because ‘misguided youth’ did not allow them to be taken to hospital? Thanks to the outcry over ‘excessive use of force’, the anti-nationals now know they can heckle armed CRPF men without fear of retaliation. This must stop. We ordinary citizens have a duty too. We must at the very least make our voices heard over the din if we believe we should support our soldiers. Our braves need the backing of an entire nation to keep India safe.

In doing what he did, the young officer saved many lives on both sides of the divide. Isn’t that what we as a nation want? Although an enquiry has been ordered ‘against the QRT Commander’, I was glad to see the Attorney General of India (Mukul Rohtangi) give the officer a pat on the back for doing what he did under the circumstances. In my personal opinion, for whatever it is worth, the officer should be awarded for exceptional leadership because his ‘out of the box solution’ and quick action successfully saved trapped co-citizens while preventing collateral damage. Maybe, just maybe there is still time for the likes of Omar, Mehbooba, Digvijay, Arvind, Yechury, Yedyurappa etc. to try and improve their own ‘leadership qualities?’

Akshay is now openly smiling his approval. I smile at the thought of him smiling.

In seeking to learn more, I found these unusual quotes. We will be happy to read some of your favorite ones as well.

Quotes on Leadership

Leadership is not about the next election, it’s about the next generation.

Simon Sinek

Leadership is not about a title or a designation. It’s about impact, influence and inspiration. Impact involves getting results, influence is about spreading the passion you have for your work, and you have to inspire team-mates and customers.

Robin S. Sharma

A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way.

John C. Maxwell

Only the guy who isn’t rowing has time to rock the boat.

Jean-Paul Sartre

A good leader takes a little more than his share of the blame, a little less than his share of the credit.

Arnold H. Glasow

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.

John Quincy Adams


As always, we as a family draw hope and strength from Akshay’s extraordinary life and we are very grateful to all of you for being with us.

Please do post your comments. Thank you.

Jai Hind.

P.S. It is painful and frustrating to see that no acceptable solutions to the Kashmir problem have been put forth by the powers that govern our country and the state of J&K. Individuals like Major Gaurav Arya have given their opinion on a comprehensive way forward. Do read and react to THE IRON IN OUR SOUL April 13, 2017 on:

To see the video on the bond between a young injured officer and his men, go to:

49 thoughts on “Connected By Loss: Some Thoughts on Leadership

  1. Your words take us through a gamut of emotions, there’s love, dismay, pride, despair, desperation, joy, vulnerability…everything touches our hearts. You are so very right in your thinking but Meghna people like you and me are in a minority. There are no sane citizens anymore. I am ashamed of the majority of people in politics and their conniving machinations. Yet we stay hopeful that some statesman kind of leader will appear and get us out of this mess. And that Akshay will continue to light other young and old paths and we’ll find the courage and spirit to do the right thing. Bless you with more strength to continue what you are doing. Hugs to you and your family my dear friend


    • Love and hugs to you too Geetanjali. Thank you for reading and for your response. I continue to be hopeful that our younger citizens will rise above the much and stand with what is good for our nation. Akshay and his ilk have shown what they are capable of. Let us stay positive. You may be right though….only time will tell….?


  2. Brilliantly written, Meghna. I think other people, mainly civilians and some ‘others’ need to know and understand. Sharing.


  3. Beautiful, poignant & powerful…all at the same time. Lot of thoughts swirling in mind and I will come back in a day or two to share them. I hope you find strength in every which way you can in the meantime. I have been thinking of you too. Loads of virtual hugs coming your way!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Dear Aunty
    Out of all of your blog posts, I can sense it that this has emerged out of a lot of grief and at a time when your heart is full of emotions.. emotions indicative of sorrow, pain, pride, a sense of unfairness, anguish, helplessness and much more. And I can understand this.. sadly cannot do anything to help you.
    Except for the reassurance that there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Meaning of Naina is eyes and eyes are associated with light.. so this sprightly sweet little baby will pull you all through.
    The video of the young officer gave me goosebumps.. Our soldiers are truly the children of the soil and it is amazing and unbelievable to fathom their dedication and capabilities.
    We have to keep faith that things will be better one day.
    Good wishes for your trip.
    Love to everyone in the family..

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you Ruchi, for your thoughts, concern and good wishes. Yes, Naina is doing a lot to take us along with her! My hope is a better tomorrow for our nation and its people. This will only happen if our braves get the respect and support of all of us. Love and take care.


  5. Hello aunty! Not only Akshay and neha, we are your children too! You must not physically be present with us but your words provide us deep compassion and true grit to lead a healthy and powerful life. Mj akshay taught us selflessness like no one else could…it takes courage to be a saviour for souls whom you don’t know personally… he went there, fought and will forever be the glee king of thousands living on this planet. that ever smiling face of his, witty ideas , those humongous humour bouts of joy when in his company… all is cherished and stays within the blessed quarters in our heart! Wishing you much strength and love always 🌹

    Liked by 1 person

    • I love what you said abour Akshay Ritu- thank you. Yes of course, you all are our children, children of our nation. I am sure our nation will be better because you young people will rise above divisive politics and put each other first. As Akshay and his ilk have done. Love and take care.


  6. I am a civilian. Not at all brave like our men at the border or their family. When ever I see and read about Kashmir it frustrates and am in tears for these young men. Guide us to supporting our soldiers and putting an end to this nonsense. I feel no politician should be given security if he doesn’t talk in favour of India .


    • I admire your stand Padmashree…and I thank you for reading and posting your comments. We all have it within us to be brave- no matter what comes our way, if we can take sides with what is right, for the sake of our people and our nation, we can change what is not right. Love to you and God bless your family.


  7. Mrs Meghna, you are a brilliant writer!!! Love the way, you put across your views, your emotions, your pain…. I can actually feel, your feelings… Do take care… Sangeeta is always in our thoughts…


  8. My Love to angel Naina…I know and understand being mom that no words will you solace your heart when blues and memoirs are thick, still salute to your strength and grace to be wonderful grandma. I agree the Head of nation which from decades is cared by young blood is now becoming sore in nation due to so called Intellects and human right activist. Sick this nation is where human rights is with traitors and not with soldiers. Whatever 10-20 leaders speak but still majority of nation is with Uniform guys and with whole hearten respect and trust on their action. Love to you and all family


    • Thank you for your concern and support to or family Ranjana. Glad you feel most of our citizens support our security forces. Love to you too. God bless your family.


  9. In one reality, it is often said that soldiers in action do not feel pain. Perhaps it is because they have risen to the highest level of function. This is such an uncommon state that the closest approximation, possibly, is a deeply religious experience.
    In another reality, the lack of Leadership is a very justified question for why these events occur.
    It is very difficult to assimilate one reality when we view both these realities simultaneously.
    By writing about Akshay you are letting the world know about the infinite possibilities of goodness and the determination of a few good men and women to ensure it.
    That’s true to his character.
    So write on, ma’am !
    …The world will listen.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Akshay. That you share the same name is making me feel happy right now! Guess we all live moment to moment, and to try and do the best we can, while we can, can make a difference. Hopefully. Take care.God bless.


  10. Very well put across Meghna. I agree with each n every word uve said. Like always I salute ur strength. A very safe journey to u both.
    Just yesterday I was thinking that it’s time for u to write about Akshay. Though haven’t met anyone of u personally there’s a sense of connection with u all . I don’t know how n why. Akshay n u all specially U, Sangeeta n the little angel are always in my thoughts.
    Tc and tight hugs to u and baby.


  11. Moved by the article M’am. Unfortunately, it is the self interest, greed and small mindedness that causes strife. The rigged elections of 1987 to hoist Abdullah as CM started the present strife in Kashmir. No Congress man talks about it, Chidambaram included. Bush and Blair conspired together and lied to displace Saddam. How many soldiers and civilians lost their life? And for what? The so called civilised west has done nothing to make them pay for their misdeeds. Sadly, no one talks about it even. But a soldier, taught to be a soldier, fights for the country right till the very end.

    Liked by 1 person

    • You have a point. Despite all the greed and self interest, a good soldier will do what he has to for his country.Maybe that is why they say soldier’s spirit never dies. case in point- Commander Chetan Cheetah back after surviving 9 bullets and a coma says he wants his next posting to be Kashmir. Thank you for reading and responding. Take care.


    • Oh yes it did Ankita! Akshay would have been the first one to post this- very happy some things are changing. We are all going to make things better together right? In small ways, we can. Thank you for sharing. Lots of love and God bless


  12. Thanks for writing, Aunty! In a world where each one of us is suffering in our own ways; no pain compares to the pain of a mother losing her child. And this comes across in each n every post of yours. Love you & admire your strength.
    Loads and loads of love to Naina & your entire family.


    • Such is reality Khush- each one experiences suffering , just as each one also experiences joy. Two sides of life. We all must accept and cope while thanking the almighty for what we have.Love and take care. Thank you for your love and concern.


  13. Dear Meghana ma’am, I have been reading up every bit written about Major Akshay and stared at his smiling face endless times. Such purity in his smile and eyes. I would like to say the same about you as well. Your article about him always filled my eyes with tears. We are really really proud of him and salute him. As you mentioned the least we could do is to be a good citizen of Bharat. The games politicians are playing is dirty and disgusting… I guess it is always been like this ever since human race appeared on the face of earth.. Earlier they were called Devas and asuras. Now we can find Devas in humans like Major Akshay and Asuras in terrorists and may politicians.. 😦


    • Dear Mohini, The way you have analysed human behaviour and linked mythology to reality today is remarkable. Thank you – it is comforting to me- Akshay was a Dev- no doubt. We were blessed to have him in our life and the grief is because he went before we parents did. Not right to question life’s ways maybe?

      Notice we share a surname too. Sure we will all continue to bond over brave soldiers like Akshay and do our best for our country. Love and take care.


  14. A digression but this comes out of annoyance:
    The irony is that after Major Akshay lost his life, maybe 30th nov -2nd Dec 2016 was the time span that he got coverage.It is because of your blog, that a small group of people ( I say small considering our entire nation) remember him. But you see Burhan Wani and his name is etched out on everyone’s mind. There are people who cry foul when he is killed. Such hypocrites are responsible for the J&K situation. The separatist leaders and militants want azadi, but I am sure that they do not know what to do with it.The leftist, human rights activist and other conspiracy theorist (activists and politicians included) want political mileage. No body cares for the people of J&K in real. And the army men are scapegoats. In-spite of such unruly characters plaguing our nation the army personnel believe in sacrificing their life. I think it is our responsibility to make these sacrifices worth, I owe my freedom and happiness to Akshay and the army. Whenever I encounter J&K sympathizers (trust me I find a lot of them-and that is a whole different story) I take it as a personal responsibility to give a piece of my mind. I think every responsible citizen should do that.


    • You are right Pradnya. However, I feel it is not how much coverage our bravehearts get in comparison to terrorists that matters….it is the public perception of who the real heroes are that will eventually matter. You have taken responsibility to make people aware of our soldiers efforts and sacrifice. So, if all of us keep doing our bit, it might help deal with the j&K and benefit our country. That will honour the sacrifice of Akshay and his brothers. Thank you for your concern and support. Love and take care


      • I agree that public perception of our real heroes matters. But the media is responsible to create public perceptions. There is no coverage on the life of people like Akshay and others who made sacrifices for our nation. Or maybe the death of a soldier in conflict ridden J&K is commonplace for media( no TRPS for such heroes). When one has a loving family, a great career, hopes and aspirations he does not desire death.Yet, one chooses death over all those wonderful things just for the nation’s security.One has to be stubbornly selfless to do that. But here you have the media narrating the life of Burhan Wani an aimless youth,depressed soul out on a suicidal mission. He is easily manipulated by the separatist in becoming a militant, and such a loser is compared to Bhagat singh?! That saddens me! So if not the media I feel each one of us should be vocal and educate our fellow citizens.
        And I really appreciate you wrote the blog holding your tears back, Else another hero would have faded into oblivion

        Liked by 1 person

      • Yes Pradnya, you are right. Each of us must be careful not to be influenced by what is wrong, and be vocal as a responsible citizen who cares about the future of our nation. The media is losing credibility and that is a step in the right direction. If more people think with clarity, we will be more united in supporting those who protect us. Akshay’s loss is devastating and yet, he continues to be our strength. Thank you for reading and responding. Love and take care.


    • I will be very happy to see you and more of us, as responsible citizens, take sides with those who are protecting our nation and all of us. Thank you for such a clear articulation of your thoughts. I am still hopeful that despite all the ‘publicity’ the terrorist leaders and separatists get, the general public perception will veer in favour of what a few good men (and women) are doing for our naton. Hope I am right. Love and take care.


  15. Ma’am every moment is spent thinking about the positiveness that akshay carried with him all the time where ever he went. It’s so hard to believe that such a wonderful person is not amongst us today… however his actions have thought me so many things which have helped me become a better person… proud to be his friend


    • He will always be with all of us who knew him well Satish- family, friends, men from his unit…… The spirit of a soldier like Akshay is too powerful to fade away. Take care.God bless you all.


  16. Poignant and father was an army officer and went through two wars .had tears in my eyes while reading this.there are no human rights for the army.totally support what that young officer did in Kashmir.the politicians sit in their ac comfort and send out pompous sound bytes.they are the ones who have failed us.thank you for sharing this with us.your son must have been a true leader.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Piyali…my father is also a retired army officer and a vetaran of three wars. Instantly feel what you do. Yes, Akshay was fantastic in every way and his martyrdom is a huge huge loss we all must cope with as well as we can. Love and take care


  17. Well can’t say mine ,it’s with all of us. mind is full of anger, heart is full of pain,soul is hurt, feels like to do so much . Expect something devastating to happen that should change everything in favour.
    Came out with few words:
    Well basic root cause problem of Kashmir is religion. If Kashmir have mixed population of Hindus, Sikhs. Christians and Muslims there won’t be any issue . Now as the whole world is struggling with the rigid ideology and beliefs.
    So it’s same with Kashmiris they are brain washed . They have a belief that their counterpart lives just across the border and they shout that and favours that . It’s a clear alignment of ideology nothing to do with nation, they don’t follow that concept.
    Need a strong action of leave the country, India controls the territory so have full right to amend the rules who wants to live here and stays faithful,rest leave, repatriate displaced back with full force . Let RR take over, no police,no media,no internet.
    Strike with full force.
    Kashmiri issue kuch nahi bas Mulle ka Mulle se pyar Hai. Kashmiri Mussalman Paki muslmaan o aa ho jaye ek Jaan . Bhadh me jaye Hindustan . Kashmiri ka Na koi din maan . Abdulla , Gellani . Mufti Sab ne bech khaya imaan . Pathther Apni kismat ko mar rahe Kashmiri nojwaan.
    We have to make it loud . Loud enough let Army take over with full power . Rashtriya Rifles . No crpf, no police,no media, no politics .

    Jeet powerful ki hoti hai or
    Darr se hee mohabaat hoti hai.
    Jai Hind

    Liked by 1 person

    • Many people share your anger and angst Lokesh. I do hope our leaders have the vision and the courage to take the right decisions and we are united in our support of what needs to be done to sort this issue out. Fingers crossed, eyes skywards. Take care. Jai Hind.


  18. “Connected By Loss: Some Thoughts on Leadership What Qualities Define a Leader?” is another inspiring article. The political leaders and the leaders in various other professions are all the same. Not sure how many of them realize their responsibility when they reach such high positions. Although the want for more money and power is the driving force in most leadership scenarios, it is still a question mark if these, the so called leaders know why they want it and what are they going to do with it? “Greater pay comes with greater responsibilities“, I am not sure how many people in leadership positions in various departments currently, realize it. I am sure there may be a few of them, but going through a lot of pain at their level trying to work with other hungry wolves who just want to satisfy their appetite. However, I strongly believe that only people with right intention, when raised to high leadership positions can use their power in the right way, no matter how difficult it is. But that’s not what happens in this world. People with true passion, genuine intentions and hard work are the first to be knock down by any means. Life stories, sacrifices and proper recognitions awarded to real heroes like Maj. Akshay and others can help in serving as a source of encouragement, inspiration and role models to the people of this era. Aunty, I strongly believe, little Naina, who is wrapped in the same love and values will certainly grow up to be a strong woman, excelling in the field that she will be passionate about and of her choice. Love and prayers and to all home.


    • Its only a few good men and women who have always led the rest of us in the right direction Amritha- dont you think so too? The majority- either misled, selfish, mean or silent- can never be compared with those who have good intentions and leadership qualities. Thank you for your apt comments and clarity on the ‘real world’. Appreciate all the love and prayers that come Naina and Sangeeta’s way. Ours too! You take care. Lots of love


      • Yes aunty, I agree that a few good men and women have always led us in the right direction. Their path could be very challenging in doing it. The articles that you write depicting wisdom and courage will always serve as a source of encouragement and comfort to those good fighters especially at their difficult times and will also be instrumental in bringing about a change in others. Take care aunty.


  19. Meghna read it and reread it….. was reminded of something I had read long ago……Being deeply loved , gives you Strength…..loving deeply gives you Courage….So apt for you Dear…and this is what Akshay inherited from you.
    Wisdom,Compassion and Courage..Akshay had it all…..
    Sadly most of our leaders lack it all.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Such a sweet simple response from you and it really touched me Poonam. Thank you. We all need to hold on tight to the qualities that matter- dont we? Akshay’s loss has been devastating and yet, we find ways to cope with courage and love. You take care.


  20. Beautifully expressed and touching. Your son Akshay was a true brave heart and a patriot. My father too was an army officer and veteran of three wars. I don’t know if the blood of our bravehearts and their ultimate sacrifice is even recognized by the nation. The politicians are busy passing irresponsible statements and are tying the hands of our soldiers to uphold the integrity of our nation. The local kashmiri is misguided and our poor sons and daughters are like cannon fodder to the ungrateful locals. Am angry sad and hopefull. Don’t know how these emotions run parallel. Have read all your blogs and they are so beautifully expressed. Akshay was a wonderful son, brother, husband and father . He has left you all with wonderful memories and we are all proud of him. Blessings to Sangeetha and Naina. In your loving care Naina will grow up to be a fine lady and Akshay will be very proud of her. Take care Meghana. Regards.


    • Thank you for reading and responding Medha. My dad was a veteran of three wars too- we have that in common, as well as the angst that our politicians have failed our soldiers. Yes, Akshay has left us beautiful, unforgettable memories and more, which we are grateful for. We also take strength from him and will go on with pride. sweet of you to bless Naina and Sangeeta- thank you. Love and take care.


      • We were together in Gorakpur and saw Neha and Girish as babies. Makes this moment all the more poignant . Take care and God bless you all!


      • Oh yes…do remember. Thank you again for reconnecting. Maybe we will meet again too….. Trust all of you are doing well? Take care. Love


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